THIS WEEK IN HOLLYWOOD

I can't believe it! Celebrities read my blog! And not only do they read it, but they obviously take what I say to heart. The proof is in the pictures:

Katie Holmes and Suri

Look at those newly trimmed bangs! She can actually tell it's
a cupcake she's eating. Although now she'll also be able to see
the scary guy following them. (Let's hope it's a bodyguard.)

Shia LaBeouf

Aw, now I feel bad. I've obviously given
him a complex about his spittle-covered lower
lip and now he tucks it in in embarrassment.
It's okay, Shia, you let that shiny lip out, I won't
say anything else about it, I promise.

Matthew McConaughey

I made a plea for no more pictures of Matthew shirtless,
playing some kind of sport. My wish was granted, and
instead we were all blessed with this shot of Matthew
wearing a shirt (j.k. livin', of course) cleaning out the
crap hose of his RV. Thanks for this gem, guys.



These celebrities obviously don't read my blog:


Portia de Rossi and Ellen Degeneres

Portia--apparently you didn't get my memo--
I'm seeing way too much of the red country plaid.


Mischa Barton

She has the nerve to launch a new line of these
rockin' headbands. Seriously, does her stylist
hate her? Somewhere Nicole Richie is celebrating
that her heinous trend is catching on.

Minnie Driver

Minnie, despite what Mary Kate
thinks, pants are a good thing.