THIS WEEK IN HOLLYWOOD

So with the news this week that Ashlee Simpson and her fiance, Pete Wentz, are expecting a baby, I decided to do a This Week in Hollywood: Baby Edition. (Yeah, I know I was supposed to do one of all the celebrities I like, but the storm cloud over my head is making it hard for me to be all cheery and positive right now. I have a feeling that making fun of celebrities is going to make me feel a whole lot better.) There seems to be a slew of stars with "baby bumps," and I know some of you have been wondering what you could send these happy parents-to-be for a baby gift. So, having the insider knowledge that I do of the goings on in Hollywood, I thought I'd give you some ideas of stuff I think they'd appreciate.

Ashlee Simpson

Prevacid (for that pesky acid reflux), eyeliner (for him, not for her),
and a gift certificate to Rodeo Drive Plastic Surgery
(where they "treat everybody like a celebrity.")


Angelina Jolie

Baby's First Passport and a school bus converted into a van

Gwen Stefani
A L.A.M.B. romper and a bottle of peroxide


Jamie Lynn Spears

Fortunately for her, Jamie Lynn doesn't need much.
Just a diploma, a husband, and about four more birthdays.

Tori Spelling

Their own reality show (cause two just isn't enough), Season 3 of
90210 on DVD (Donna Martin graduates!), and a guest appearance on Cheaters


Nicole Kidman

Sunblock, Unisom, and man hair for her husband


Angela Kinsey

A poster of her baby wearing sunglasses and playing the saxophone.


Jessica Alba

A DVD of Into the Blue, so she can always relive the glory days:
her body, pre-baby

Minnie DriverA onesie that says Who's Your Daddy?


Lauren Conrad

Okay, she's not pregnant.
That's the nicest thing I can say about her, Nicole.